Denial is a Powerful Tool, We Use it to Avoid our Reality

Denial is a powerful tool.

Never underestimate its ability to cloud your vision. Be aware that for many reasons, we have become experts at using this tool to make reality more tolerable. We have learned how to stop the pain caused by reality – not by changing our circumstances, but by pretending our circumstances are something other than what they are.

While one part of us was busy creating a fantasy-reality, the other part went to work on accepting the truth of that fantasy. Now is the time to find the courage to face truth.

To over come denial

Let the truth of your circumstances sink in gently and embrace it.  Allow yourself to sit with the pain the situation has caused you.  Be angry, be upset, cry or whatever you need to do to release how you truly feel. This is how you begin to deal with all pain.  You must embrace it, sit with it, touch it and feel it… Once you are willing to embrace your pain you can now embrace the truth and begin the healing and realization process. Prepare to move forward in your life.

Know that Spirit has already blessed you with the courage and the strength to have total clarity and that you are now LIVING YOUR POWER to move forward to LIVE the Greater experience called YOU.





The pyramid of denial


The order listed starts with the base of the pyramid and goes up to the bottom to the top.

Pyramid of Denial - Dr. Diva Verdun– negative affect: getting angry, irritated, or upset.

– source derogation: insulting the source, dismissing their expertise or trustworthiness, or otherwise rejecting their validity

– selective exposure: leaving the situation or tuning out the persuasive message

– assertions of confidence: “nothing/no-one could change my position”

– social validation: “Einstein said that too so I’m right and you’re wrong”

– message distortion: selectively processing or understanding a persuasive message in a way that favors one’s original attitude. That should be at the bottom along with selective exposure, IMO, those attitudes are just the best way to turn an interesting discussion into a stupid dialogue of the deaf.

– attitude bolstering: presenting arguments for one’s position without responding to the arguments presented

– counter-arguing: actually responding to arguments. Congrats for reaching the top!


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