Stand up for what you believe in, even if you're standing alone. ~Dr. Diva Verdun - http://DivaVerdun.com

Flack from Setting Boundaries – Standing Up For Yourself


We need to know how far we’ll go, and how far we’ll allow others to go with us. Once we understand this, we can go anywhere. ~Beyond Codependency

When you own your power to take care of yourself – set a boundary, say no, change an old pattern – you may get flack from some people. That’s okay.  You don’t have to let their reactions control you, stop you, or influence your decision to take care of yourself.

You don’t have to control their reactions to your process of self-care.  That is not your responsibility. You don’t have to expect them not to react either.

People will react when you do things differently or take assertive action to nurture yourself, particularly if your decision in some way affects them. Let them have their feelings. Let them have their reactions.  But continue on your course anyway.

If people are used to you behaving in a certain way, they’ll attempt to convince you to stay that way to avoid changing the system.  If people are used to you saying yes all the time, they may start mumbling and murmuring when you say no. If people are used to you taking care of their responsibilities, feelings, and problems, they may give you some flack when you stop.  That’s normal.  You can learn to live with a little flack in the name of healthy self-care. Not abuse, mind you. Flack.

If you are used to people controlling through guilt, bullying, and badgering, they may intensify their efforts when you change and refuse to be controlled. That’s okay. That’s flack too.

You don’t have to let flack pull you back into old ways if you have decided you want and need to change.  You don’t have to react to flack or give it much attention.  It doesn’t deserve it. It will die down.

Today, I will disregard any flack I receive for changing my behaviors or making other efforts to be myself.

~Melody Beattie

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